Tips on Preventing Cyber-Bullying
At our summer camp in the Midwest, we recognize how important parents value the safety of their children in a physical location. It is no less important in the “virtual” world. Indeed, especially as social media become increasingly prevalent in the lives of youth, we need to be mindful of the impact that smartphone and online computer use can have on our children. Cyber-bullying is real, and bears a huge daily toll on many young people.
Here are a few ways that we can help. Even if you can’t necessarily be there in person, or—for some of us—figure out the intricacies of Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, here are some concrete steps you can take to protect your child.
First, teach your child to take care while going online. The Internet is not a place where “anything goes” regarding social interaction. Precisely because it can seem so laissez-faire, many dangers lurk. A purported 12-year-old Facebook “friend” could actually be a 35-year-old sex offender. Even if your child “chats” for months with an online “friend” and feels that they are truly friends, as a parent, you need to help your child realize that it’s not a real friendship and that meeting such “friends” in person is a very dangerous idea.
Second, if a situation arises that you think might even hint at being cyber-bullying, you should call the school or venue that connects the bully to your child … and be sure to document things in writing. Administrators are much more likely to be motivated to act to stop cyber-bullying if you are active and informed.
Third, if the business or institution won’t help, there are legal processes that can help protect your child. Civil rights laws cover all forms of sexual bullying, and most forms of cyber-bullying. So a judge can order the school or business to use available technology to help stop the harassment; or it could take steps to separate the offending youth.
Here are some useful safety tips to help guide social networking in your home:
Everyone’s doing it! So, instead of attempting to deny your child’s access and participation in online socializing, try to create a safe and empowering experience around your child’s participation in online communities by using common sense, open dialogue, and establishing simple guidelines.
For Parents:
- Begin an open conversation about your child’s social networking. Establish a framework that is not antagonistic or accusatory.
- Create your own Facebook or Instagram account and spend some time browsing so that you can act like you know!
- If your child has an account, have them show it to you. Know your child’s passwords, screen names and account information so that you can view their pages. Periodically monitor their account.
- Your child should “friend” only people s/he knows in real life.
For Children:
- Talk with your parents so they can understand the role of social networking in your life.
- Never post anything you wouldn’t want your parents, teachers, camp directors, or future employers to see.
- Never post personal information (phone number, E-mail or address) of you or your friends; that could put you at risk.
- Use a random picture instead of a personal picture for your online profile; your true friends know what you look like already, and will be able to see your other pictures once they’re “friended”.
- Never meet in person with anyone you first “met” online. Tell your parent if anyone requests an in-person meeting.
- Only “friend” those you know in real life. Set your account privacy settings so that you have to approve people to be added as a friend.
- Include as friends your parents and other adults you trust. Give your parents access to your profile.